KezVerse

More previews

2012-01-26T20:02:00.000-08:00

Hi there again, Internet. Here's more stuff as of late.

3D sculpt progress of my thesis hero asset, Odysseus. Poor critter won't even be seen that much, unfortunately, and when you do see him, he will be in silhouette for the most part. Regardless, I still plan on making this guy a wicked asset to my portfolio, so he will be worked on until he meets the highest standard I can manage. For now, you only get a tiny preview. Mwahahaha.

A Lusca (or sharktopus) commission for an old friend of mine.

What if crocodiles had bodies built like wolves..?

Erin keeps her chin up... or at least tries to.

Rao steps into the spotlight for the next portrait!

Hmm what could this be?

More arts

2012-01-14T18:49:00.000-08:00

More progress on the Captain, a starting composition of Erin, and a beastie.

The eyes have it

2012-01-13T19:19:00.001-08:00

Captain.

Heh?
-Kez

Sushi pun jokes!

2012-01-13T14:59:00.000-08:00

In my spare time, I'll try to come up with new jokes. They're mostly pun-based. So! Here are some sushi roll jokes, and as puns, they are better said than typed. Prepare to ~roll~ your eyes!

A fighter pilot walks into a sushi bar. What does he order?
- A barrel roll!

Internet trolls walk into a sushi bar. What do they order?
- A Rick-roll!

A little kid walks into a sushi bar. What does he order?
- A role model!

A Roman walks into a sushi bar. What does he order?
- A caesar roll!

A ship captain walks into a sushi bar. What does he order?
- A roll call!

And there are more somewhere that I may add later.
Heehee.
-Kez

The Pun Warrior and her Jar Gun

2011-12-27T07:02:00.000-08:00

I'm half certain a Jar Gun, however hilarious, would be an inefficient means of destruction, unless used by a politician.

Speaking of politicians, I've been wondering why they come across as so solidly lacking in intelligence. Especially regarding the issues they need to be knowledgeable about, like science, humanity, or the Internet; they have a severe case of 'what is this, I don't even.'

This causes me to wonder about a solution to the inevitable problem of who should be in charge of people. I, for one, think it may be a breath of fresh air if smart people actually ran the world. A conglomerate of highly skilled and well-experienced individuals, each of their own field - biology, war, art, transportation, food, etc - who discuss the state of the country and, based on their collective intellect and empathy, make decisions that actually practically pertain to this universe in a positive way. They would be elected still, not only by the people but by their fellow people in the field. If a field is divided, more people can be appointed perhaps? Who knows.

The one thing that bothers me about today's method of electing people with money and/or charismatic happy little faces is that sure, yeah, they can honey up the audience with well-chosen diction, but do they even know basic science? It seems that we especially keep electing those who know people, but not about what those people really need. We need food, education, transportation, efficiency, entertainment, protection, and diversity but unity. To run a country takes huge, whopping amounts of consideration, and I don't think half-bought politicians who believe the Earth is 6,000 years old should be in charge of the next generation's up-bringing.

Of course, I'm merely a humble artist with a brain that dreams about tigers running amuck during football games and city parks inhabited by ostrich people and hippies who launch lunar landers into space and have parties in anticipation upon their return. There is one thing I'm fairly certain of: the information age is shifting. Data can be found anywhere online. The Internet knows more than any one person could possibly comprehend.

This is where an enormous uprising of creative people may burst forth. We need critical thinking, creative thinking, and practical understanding; all to assess this information given to us, and to further human development. The majority of humans can't compare to computers when it comes to memorization and pulsing out info like it's a natural heartbeat. We differ immensely in that we can think. We can think outside of what's possible - outside of what we're told - and that's what we should be shifting our attention to. The next age may very well belong to the artists and the scientists. It would of course be a shame if one lived without the other. They need each other like the heart and brain. One can not exist without its companion, or an imbalance will bubble out of humankind's body and fester like a disease. The heart provides life, purpose, emotion, drive - the brain provides logic, thought, consideration, problem-solving. They're perfect for each other.

That was a dose of my Jar Gun. It's all opinion and unedited banter, so take it lightly and take care.

Happy holidays!
-Kez

Blitzfrenzy

2011-12-04T21:13:00.001-08:00

Check it out - please click the image to see and experience it fully.

-Kez

Hide, Daniel.

2011-11-14T22:10:00.001-08:00

Daniel.

Come out, Daniel.

I found your little lamp.

Don't you want it back?

...
Come out, Daniel.

Fan art of Amnesia: the Dark Descent. Fun times. *shudder* I love that game.

-Kez

Amnesia: the Dark Descent (C) Frictional Games

AaD process video

2011-10-20T17:57:00.000-07:00

Hey world, how's it going?

I thought I'd explain the aesthetic choices and endeavors for this most recent piece here. First off, I wanted to make a badass image with a wicked creature. Fair enough, right? I drew this guy a while ago but haven't really touched the poor thing since:

As you can see, I still have a lot of detail to add to the digital painting (it's very much a work in progress). Second, I wanted the viewer to be more involved with the image - I wanted drastic perspective, action, foreshortening, all that fun stuff. So I made the format require scrolling to really get a sense of how dangerous this creature is. At full size, no matter what screen resolution, I want the viewer to have to scroll up and down, as if they were looking up at the jumping defender, out at the attacker, and down at their crushed body. We'll see if it works.

Any suggestions or comments are always welcome!
-Kez

AaD, wip

2011-10-20T00:34:00.000-07:00

Moar

-Kez

Attack and defend

2011-10-18T01:30:00.000-07:00

Needs more cowbell!
-Kez

Sillie, the ship's cat

2011-10-17T22:18:00.000-07:00

A shitty little drawing of a Martian rust cat. This one is the resident pest-control officer of the Sapona, and her name is Sillie.

"Silly Sillie, that's not a rat, that's a dual-carbonium plasmasine fuel cell! Awww."

Peace,
-Kez

Raol

2011-10-07T20:49:00.001-07:00

"Raol, the deity of Water, is this mythical creature whose neck and head were sacrificed and replaced with an eternally-flowing waterfall. The flow never stops; if Raol stays in one place too long, the entire area is flooded and destroyed. That is why it wanders the world, feeling around blindly - mindlessly - for a parched land where its powers can help. My parents didn't mean to name me after it, but it suits me well enough, actually. I'm never in one place too long, and all I want to do is help people when they are in need. I would like to keep my head, of course! Hahaha!"

Work in progress!

(C) Kezrek, 2011

Dancing loop dude

2011-10-07T20:41:00.000-07:00

Loop loop loop loop loop

Work in progress!

The music is from The Stars Will Aid Her Escape, by Not A Clever Pony.

Been a while

2011-09-25T14:42:00.001-07:00

With warm rain pattering lightly on the windshield, did it matter where I was going? Sunlight and the scent of wet, molten pavement, the crystal glistening of puddles, the familiar hum of the Dragon's engine purring beneath my steering wheel; this was the journey and I deeply wished never to reach the end. And yet, such a journey without an end... would it be a journey at all?
-K

Aetallas

2011-08-18T16:42:00.000-07:00

Relatively finished. Feel free to use it as a wallpaper if you wish - just do not take it as your own.

Dreamt

2011-08-18T00:17:00.000-07:00

Yet another dream.

I was a sort of intergalactic surgeon, in a room under close observation of a dead patient who just arrived from an uncharted planet. In the room were only myself and two other doctors who were helping with my procedure. Before the operation, there were a bunch of small floating robots around, and in my pointless immaturity I ran around and broke all of them.

One of the helpers blinked at me and asked, ‎"Are you planning on paying for those?"

I responded by chuckling lightly and saying yes, it was a hobby of mine to break those annoying robots. He gave me a weird look before we began suiting up for the operation.

The room blared white and empty save for the body in the middle. I didn't remember if this was brain surgery, or if his head was somehow missing. A family was watching us from a glass room nearby.

When I stared intensely into the area I was supposed to be working on, without explanation I abruptly had no idea what was going on. I remember wondering whether this was a new-age mental surgery, where I controlled the tools with my mind, or if it was traditional.

I looked at the openings in the body. They were surrounded by sterile paper. Inside, the organs resembled brains but were white and pulsating. One dent in the brain had a pool of violet grime growing on it.

Cold sweat began oozing from my forehead as I gazed into the purple glob. "Uh... What exactly am I looking for, again?"

The helpers responded with some medical and technological nonsense, after which they both sighed at my stupidity and began stopping the surgery.

They both took their masks off. One helper walked into the family's room, leaving the glass door separating us open. Then, with sheer violence, the other helper gasped and collapsed to the ground, seizing and convulsing and decaying right before my eyes.

The other helper bolted to aid him, but breathed in the toxic violet spore, which immediately attacked his lungs with just as much fervor.

I jolt backward from the open body and scream at the frantic family; "DON'T BREATHE! DON'T BREATHE! RUN!"

-the end-

---

That, and this WIP.

As legend goes, in the early days of human consciousness, the world was drowning in its own confusion. War, pain, slavery, poverty, hatred, and injustice ran rampant through the land and poisoned the hearts of all men but one. This person's internal rage summoned Aetallas, the dragon god of Vengeance, from the Sun.

It first appeared from a war-torn and fire-blooded sky and descended upon the vile humans. Blind to reasoning, it obliterated all of the evil and wicked with its solar flare fire-breath. Vengeance saved no one from its aimless wrath besides the children and innocents. Not even the summoner was spared.

Unable to fly back to its birthplace in the Sun, Aetallas created a temple beneath the very rock the children stood upon. It lives to this day in the earth's mantle, waiting for its name to be called upon again.

Wanderlust

2011-08-13T20:16:00.000-07:00

This is where my mind drifts whenever sound fades and sight repeats.

Traditional

2011-07-28T10:27:00.000-07:00

Digitals

2011-07-28T10:24:00.000-07:00

Curiosity

2011-07-17T09:18:00.001-07:00
I can't/won't show you the final, but here's the initial sketch for one of the book images:

Eventually, the explorers decided to see how closely they could approach one of the planet's creatures, starting with a docile and friendly species they called Canopy Brachiocats.

Plight of The Thinker

2011-07-10T16:08:00.000-07:00
Inspired by the Dali Museum. There's probably hidden symbolism in here, but what and where it is, is up to you.

Lately I've been feeling incredibly disheartened. It's not one particular aspect that brings me down. It's an unhealthy bounty of life-draining scenarios. Physical pains to mental pains, and everything in-between.

Hopefully I've let go of it with this artsy apprehension. Good riddance - I'm tired of this.

Here's to a better tomorrow,
-Kez

Greehound

2011-06-17T22:33:00.000-07:00

Another book thumbnail preview. Right as the 'photographer' tries to take a pleasant picture of a peaceful forest creature, a Greehound - evolutionarily close to the Gree on the book cover - attacks. The photographer snaps the shot right as the Greehound leaps from the thicket and clenches its long jaw around the unsuspecting victim's neck. Brutal stuff.

I'll be using this image in my demo/tutorial video, from sketch to render techniques. You probably won't see the finished thing, mind you, as this will be in the book. I'll also discuss all the artistic choices here, too. It should be great fun.

-Kez

Crazy dream

2011-06-13T06:39:00.000-07:00
This morning, I had an intense dream, filled with vibrant color and sound and action.

The Captain and crew in one of my stories has just arrived at an enormous, interplanetary zoo / museum, that is the size of an entire city. There are all kinds of people and sentient beings there. The crew is delivering a baby "Chimippotamus," and they receive dozens of coos and squees as they give the creature to the head zookeeper. Now that the mission is done, the crew spreads around to explore the huge city.

One character, Aleks, goes to the Continent display. It turns out to be an outdoor, colossal, ever-shifting show of tectonic plates, with maps of countries and cities on them. Children play and jump around on the plates, trying to find their home countries, surprised at who they come face-to-face with as the continents move and rumble. However, something begins to go horribly wrong. One of the mechanical parts to a tectonic plate fails, causing a chain-reaction destruction; the children quickly run and scream for their lives. In an effort to help, and seeing as Aleks is a member of the ship's security, she runs down to the display and rushes as many kids as possible to safety. Eventually, the entire display crashes sideways into the ground, revealing a sandy beach-like gravel with a stream of salty water flowing through it.

Aleks goes down to the base level and walks around on the sand. She is approached by a large, alligator-like creature, who is sniffing furiously at the ground. A small hoverdeck floats toward her, upon which a zookeeper says not to worry. It's a Scentagator, harmless to anything larger than a Gophermel.

They watch the Scentagator snuff out and instantly eat some pests underneath the sand. "What's this for?" Aleks asks the alien zookeeper on the hoverdeck.

"This display failed due to a weakened structure somewhere in this region," the zookeeper replied. "We're trying to find out what happened."

Understanding the situation, Aleks shows her credentials and then searches for the cause herself. She walks over to a pile of dark-metal pipelines. After a while of looking through the rubble, with distant sounds of the Scentagator rummaging around in the sandy dirt, she spots an oddly-shaped hole in a pipe.

A small, bumble-bee / praying mantis creature pokes its head out from the hole. "Who are you."

Aleks is taken aback. "Uh... I'm Aleks. What are you?"

"I like you."

"Er..."

"Will you mate with me."

"What?!"

"Will you mate with me."

Aleks stares hopelessly at the critter. "I... I don't know what to tell you. I'm human. I can't mate with you."

"It's easy. Here, you can use my stinger." A broken-off stinger is shoved out of the hole and promptly plops to the ground.

She stares at the stinger for a moment. "...Uhhhh..."

Then without warning, the Scentagator sticks its long tongue into the hole and slurps up the bee-mantis. Aleks thinks she hears a tiny shriek and death-gurgle as the reptilian beast crunches down.

~MEANWHILE~

The Captain returns to the ship and flies to the Continent display's wreckage. The city needs all the help it can get to clear away debris before someone gets hurt. They provide hooks, lifting magnets, and gravity wells to any/all ships in the area for aid. The Captain flies his ship Sapona to and fro, transferring rubble to the water-side factory where it will be recycled. At one point he uses a magnetic lift to carry Aleks up to the ship, where she quickly falls asleep out of exhaustion. Unbeknownst to both of them, pirates are now on-board, too.

~INTERMISSION~

Dragons frantically being chased through a slanted, dark forest?

~BACK TO OUR SHOW~

With most of the crew gone, the pirates have taken over the ship. They tie up the Captain in the bridge, and the lead pirate takes the controls. They're flying farther over the water, to a chain of small yet high-reaching islands. The pirates, all three of them, boast about their success in stealing the most advanced ship in the galaxy. The Captain glares at them but says nothing.

Aleks awakens to the sound of crackling laughter and objects being thrown at other objects. She sneaks carefully out of her quaters, towards the bridge. When she gets there, she - of course - attacks the pirates. As they exchange punches and kicks and head-knocks and insults and dirty-mouthed jeers, the Captain watches in quiet dismay as the innards of his ship are ruined by collateral damage. Soon enough, a control on the dashboard is hit, and the ship plummets to the ocean.

The poor Sapona crashes and crunches, inside and out, but has actually made it to the rendez-vous point. She ends her graceful landing on the beach of a smaller island.

The pirates escape the ship and run for higher ground. Aleks runs after them without a second thought, leaving the Captain behind.

"You cowards! Get back here!!" she yells up to their hill-top orientation.

"Are you insane? A Hurricane's coming!" one of the pirates shouts back.

Aleks halts and swivels around. Sure enough, a ferocious, doom-grey cloud stew was charging straight for them. Aleks tries to rush back to the Sapona, but it's too late before the ship is knocked off the beach. The water currents actually carried the ship to a safe place, however - behind one of the tall islands.

This Hurricane then proceeds on revealing its true self: a gigantic baby harp seal.

This, only MASSIVE.

The Hurricane holds the Sapona in its giant adorable flipper. It glares daggers at the pirates. "What do you think you are doing?!" it said with the cutest, squeakiest voice ever. "This is the most advanced ship in the galaxy, and it looks like garbage now!"

They could all hear a faint 'thanks' from inside the wreckage. The Hurricane throws a wave at the pirates, who are flushed far away. The seal places the Sapona down on the top of the island hill, beside Aleks, who is dumbstruck. "Thank you... Hurricane?"

"You're very welcome. Anything for the Sapona! You guys are famous," it gives them an adorable smile, then swims off.

Aleks pries the twisted metal away from the side door, and helps the Captain out. He steps back to look at the damage. It looks like a pile of mutilated aluminum cans. "..My ship!" he groans.

~THE END~

Sneaky peeky

2011-06-10T08:40:00.000-07:00
An early thumbnail of the cover:

Developing ideas

2011-06-09T22:52:00.000-07:00
Character development for a new-ish story I'm working on. It's a mental outlet for the ideas I have that can't/don't belong in my serious work.

In the lower left is Aetallas, the dragon-spirit of Vengeance, who breathes solar flares and lives in the planet's mantle. More info to come.

Quick, loose sketch

2011-06-08T06:32:00.000-07:00
My dragon character poses for the camera.

Underneath my beautiful visage...

2011-05-27T18:20:00.000-07:00
I figured it out; I draw things that should scare me.

Better

2011-05-26T17:45:00.000-07:00
More progress... not much, though.

Lhune finished

2011-05-19T22:47:00.000-07:00
Finished

Lhune Preview

2011-05-19T21:07:00.000-07:00
I don't always draw fan art, but when I do, I make sure it's for someone I admire.

Chello

2011-05-19T19:23:00.001-07:00

Sketch plan

2011-05-19T19:10:00.001-07:00
Continued:

Sketches and works

2011-05-15T17:50:00.000-07:00
Tralalala, doodles.

Plant search

2011-05-03T20:00:00.000-07:00
On rare occasions, someone will ask what sort of things inspire me. Aside from art, ideas, and music, the natural world is strangely intriguing enough as is; if you look at it closely, it's surprising how alien it looks. I recently made another gallivant about campus, looking for compelling, beautiful, and otherwise odd plant life. It's not too hard to find, especially in Florida. Here are a few of my favorites. Some are desktop-sized so feel free to use them.

Spot the wasp!

^ The magnolias are pretty damn cool, seeing as they resemble some sort of temple or shrine. They start out as fuzzy lightbulb/flame-shaped buds, the skin of which peels off to reveal silky-smooth petals which bloom into that shiz. The petals soon brown and curl back inwards, encasing the stamen. The close-up of the stamen is my desktop background right now. Call me weird, but I think it looks pretty freakin' cool.

Meet Chello

2011-04-26T08:02:00.001-07:00
This is Chello.

Chello has been made into three whole dimensions, and has attachable parts.

And he can also walk.

the end

Dragon inspiration

2011-03-23T07:34:00.000-07:00
My friend Joe recently linked me to a ZBrush Central thread by an artist who has so far made 55 sculpted dragon heads:

I'm totally loving their head designs, to the point that I was inspired to draw my own 2D one, and make it look 3D. It's more like practice than anything. Can I draw something which could fit in beside those other dragon heads? We'll find out soon enough. For now, here's my work in progress:

I have a long way to go, but that's the fun part!

Take care,
-Kez

Day 3

2011-03-21T20:20:00.000-07:00
*sings* On the third day of conference, GDC gave to me... a one-gig bullet flash D.

Actually that was the second day of GDC, but I forgot to mention it. It's a pretty sweet flash drive even if I had to disassemble it for airport security. I got it while standing in line at Blizzard - a website representative from GamersFirst.com was handing them out and chatting with us as we waited.

Highlights of the day...

Amnesia: the Dark Descent
- Met the guys who made it
- - - Even though I've rarely considered horror to be one of my favorite genres, Amnesia has become one of my most favorite PC games ever. I'm especially impressed by the game's lack of animation, design choices, artistic style, voices, gameplay, suspense, and story. They did it all so well that the game felt seamless (and therefore, more terrifying).
- - - A few of the guys who made the game were at the indie games booth with an Amnesia demo. Amanda and I went here first and talked directly to them, asked them questions, and watched people play the demo. One of my questions was 'How did you make the monster sound?' and he replied 'Well.. it'll ruin the scariness when you find out, haha. But there's a video on Youtube of our sound designer making all the sounds.'
- - - And sure enough:

Artist Roundtable Part 2
- This was the third and last session for the Artist Roundtable, but it was my second attendance. This time I dragged Amanda along, and she took much better notes than I. On this day, a lot of topics were repeated, but of course it had a unique flare. We talked primarily about communication (with marketing, artists, tech/tools/programmers, etc). This time around, however, we dove into some specifics, such as:
- - - Communicating that art/preproduction is important
It not only saves money and effort, but time as well. You don't want to start making a game only to find out that the prop designs horrendously clash with the characters'. Concept art is valuable in that it can quickly, efficiently show the visual result of the game so that everyone is on the same level. Reiterations of design for the characters, assets, vehicles, gameplay, and environments, can be rapidly gone through to find the most effective one.
- - - Getting reference for an art bible so everyone's on the same page
One of the attendees described his studio's setup. The artists printed out and placed gorgeous, inspiring concept art all over the walls of the work area. This allowed even the technical-minded to see what the eventual goal is: it gave them aim and drive.

Blizzard chillin' and Heavy Rain
- Amanda and I decided to go to the Heavy Rain talk after this. It took a bit of exploring to find the right place, and in our hectic search we met and began conversing with Chaz Head, a lead environment artist at Blizzard who worked on StarCraft II. After the talk, we (joined by Joe) received amazing portfolio reviews from him. He gave each of us an individualized, focused critique that helped us in our respective goals. Amanda's review is of course on her blog.
- The Heavy Rain talk itself was pretty eye-opening. I had no idea they used that many actors, animations, and effects in the game. Amanda, again, describes it in better detail because I was too busy staring dumbfounded at the screen, and listening to a French girl talk on her cell phone next to me (she eventually left). I don't think she realized I could understand her..
- At any rate, portfolio advice from Chaz:
- - - Keep going with the loose under-sketches, flowing forms, connecting shapes/movements
- - - Work on more color variety
- - - Liked the sketchbook more than the refined portfolio work. Good for concept art - include this ideation in the portfolio!

:::
Overall, GDC was an amazing event that I almost can't believe I'd never been to before this year. It's incredibly valuable. One of the aspects I like most about it is the opportunity to be on your own. It's you, your art, and your dreams, all in a venture with some of the most brilliant minds of the industry. You are suddenly, abruptly, and temporarily thrown into the field. It was amazing to see how we behaved and reacted. The entire trip was fruitful, not only to learn about our prospective career, but about ourselves.

Day 2

2011-03-19T14:06:00.001-07:00
And so began Day 2...

Wacom Pester-session
- To start the day off, I decided to give the Wacom booth a visit. They had a few example Cintiqs sitting there, just waiting to be used, so naturally I took it upon myself to stand there, drawing, for two hours on end.
- This actually ended being a great idea. A lot of people stopped and watched for a while. Eventually, the Wacom staff told me to draw the logo in with the dragon I was drawing, so I did. The more I drew, the more people stopped and talked to me.
- I gave out so many business cards that I kept my little card box next to the Cintiq rather than putting it away each time. I met countless students, freelancers, lead artists (a group from Bighuge Games watched for a good while), and even a man from Barnes & Noble.
- If Ringling has their own booth next year, I will strongly urge them to have a Cintiq for students to draw on, as this seems to be an amazing method for instantly catching the eyes of all who waltz by.

Blizzard review

- I had about an hour to kill between pestering Wacom and the Lead Artist Roundtable I planned to attend soon, so I decided to give Blizzard a visit. They had two art staff giving portfolio reviews when I stood in line: Ben and Seth. As soon as I got to the front of the line, Seth (Art Manager) looked at me and said...
Seth: Err, I'm so sorry, I have to go to a talk I'm giving now.
Me: Aw man, really? Wait, is that the artist roundtable?
Seth: Yep, that's the one.
Me: Can I come with?
Seth: Um.. you know what, yeah! Let me just get my things. In the meantime, please let Ben review your work.
- He waited for my review to finish, but he ended up having to go and set up early. Regardless, I got a fantastic review from Ben:
- - - Great creatures, concepts, and colors. Very bold, recognizable, original designs.
- - - If you want to be a concept artist, leave out the 3D stuff (but keep it in your resume!).
- - - More silhouettes, explorations. He was happy that I had a few for my 3D character.
- - - We then geeked out about Wayne Barlowe's creations and books for a good 10 minutes after I mentioned a similar project I'm working on. He told me if I want to specialize in creatures, I could definitely do it. Should that be the case, my portfolio must include a huge variety of creatures and explorations, each one boggling the mind as much as Mr. Barlowe's.

Artist Roundtable Part 1

- After the review, I rushed to the Lead Artists' roundtable Seth Spaulding was conducting. I got there early because Ben understood a review from Seth was important. He gave me similar advice, but still valuable:
- - - Less local colors
- - - Keep the pieces I'm passionate about; leave out the ones I'm not
- - - Keep refining environments to have more, smaller detail
- - - Mention 3D/game design/programming work by spoken word and on the resume, rather than including it with the concept art
Seth particularly liked the green beast, which also appeared on the back of my business card:

It attracted a lot of attention during the entire conference in general.

During the actual roundtable, I mostly sat quietly and listened rather than spoke. The room was filled to the brim with lead artists, art directors, and specialists who wanted to share knowledge of how to manage the job. We discussed:

- - - Asset tracking
It's important to keep tabs on assets. Many of the art leads had issues when several different employees would make the same prop, or would have one of their props handed off to be improved upon without being told. Because of - and as well as - this, they had to make sure all the assets fit together in the game world. If an asset didn't fit, the game would not be uniform. For this reason, they discussed having a good amount of consistency for workflow as well as aesthetic result.

- - - Communication w/ the tools team
The art team can greatly benefit from the tech or tools team, but lack of communication has hindered a lot of potential here. Some artists spoke of their experience with tool creators who had an amazing tool, but no artist was told about it (simply that). The same goes vice-versa; an artist will want a tool but never ask if the tech has something like it, or can create it. In one scenario, the tool was ready and available, but no one knew about it.

- - - Scope control from design & Level of empowerment of artists
Some lead artists had the issue of their underlings doing too much amazing work. They would come up with brilliant ideas and designs which would unfortunately magnify the scope of the game. They had to reel in the creative flow of their team and make sure they stayed on track, but without destroying their imaginative thinking.

- - - Budget
Staying within the confines of the budget. This was a pretty basic topic.

- - - Vertical slice
I had no idea what a vertical slice was at the beginning of the roundtable talk, so I was a tad confused at first. A vertical slice is like a preliminary progress update to show the people investing in your team 'Yes, we can do this, and here's all the cool stuff we have so far to prove it!' Many of the artists had stories about vertical slices. One story involved the vertical slice going too far - they basically had to make the whole game in order to appease. When they needed to make changes, all that effort had gone to waste.

- - - Hard talk
The art directors mostly spoke here, about how to let troublesome employees go without being too harsh. Sometimes the artist was magnificent at their job but simply didn't do the work / get along / meet deadlines. Other times, the artist was the social butterfly, eager to make the team happy, always smiling and fun to be around... but they didn't do work well enough to pull their weight. (Those were the hardest to let go)

- - - More does not always equal better
Speaks for itself - quality over quantity.

Alumni party
- Later that day, we waltzed over to the Ringling Alumni party. Beforehand we stopped for some dinner at a Chinese restaurant, which was a great way to settle down and relax for a bit. At the party itself, I successfully got Amanda tipsy (yesss), and we yelled about nothing with British accents for a good long while. We met and pestered a few Ringling alumn who worked on Metroid, pestered Jim, and almost got a recent CA graduate to sing. It was, needless to say, a blast.

GDC Notes - Dead Space 2

2011-03-19T11:06:00.001-07:00
First, the Dead Space 2 talk by its art director, Ian Milham.

I loved this lecture because he approached the first and second games with an honest self-analysis, an aspect of personal achievement I dearly follow. He discussed:

Art style

- The sweeping artistic theme that can be seen throughout the game is the noticeable darkness. This eventually was embraced and taken further for the sequel. (Some other games and movies purposefully use darkness not only to create suspense in the audience's minds, but to save money.) For DS2, darkness was an artistic choice rather than a cost-effective one.

- Between the first and second games, they improved their utilization of color boards, giving color meaning alongside gameplay rather than just slapped together.

Research

- The art team used Gothic architecture as inspiration for the environment, and as a motif they kept repeating the 'ribbed' pattern as a stylistic choice. Isaac's design is most memorable for the ribbed pieces adorning him.

Changes

- Variety in environment
- - - Ian showed us screenshots of different areas in Dead Space, each labeled accordingly. He admitted that even though they called the areas different, the architecture was all incredibly similar. And this was true - seeing all the places side-by-side, it was evidently hard to tell one area from the next. For the second game, they fixed this very well, making it clear where the player was.

- Character development, emotion, connection
- - - In the first game, Isaac's face was never revealed until near the end, and he never spoke once. This design choice was used to give the player a blank slate to enter, rather than imposing a personality. However, this prevented the character from having any sort of say in the matter. He didn't have a voice, opinion, or connection to the player. This changed drastically - and very well - in the second game. They gave him a voice, an expressive face, emotions, and opinions. He developed as the story progressed. In the end, he even changed. In my humble opinion, this allowed for us to really care about Isaac.

- Gameplay
- - - The first Dead Space was a constant stream of action, making it less scary and more like agonizing busywork. For the second game, they changed the gameplay to include epic moments: times and events where the character is immensely focused and/or specifically directed to create tension and suspense. They also included places for the player to relax. This combination gave the game a more roller-coaster-like feel with a grand finish, rather than an arduous hike.
- - - When Amanda played a certain part in DS2, she was too terrified to do it, even though it was one of the simplest parts of the game. All she had to do was [spoiler] slowly, carefully guide a needle into Isaac's left eye. [/spoiler] The premise may be simple, but the execution was so hardcore and suspenseful that she nearly gave up out of sheer terror.

Day 2 will be posted soon!

Concepts

2011-03-12T15:58:00.000-08:00
Some extremely quick concepts for my next game prepro pitch:

^ This is something I'm actually very excited about. It may not look exciting yet, but it will.

GDC Notes - Day 1

2011-03-12T14:54:00.000-08:00
All right. Day One...

One of the first things we did was attend a roundtable for producers, discussing things such as - of course - game production, and a few issues and topics that hound their minds. We broke up into smaller groups of 7-10 people. In our group we had people varying between Martin Murphy's brother-in-law to Patrick O'Kelley, senior producer at Bungie.

Points from this discussion:

- Producers focus and direct the creativity of the team
- - - Good producers allow the artists to create the amazing things they want to create, but also round up and organize them to keep the game on-target.

- Art vs. Advertising
- - - Like games, some mediums weren't considered art when they first appeared either. Books, movies, comics, etc. Advertising and art are similar in that they both require aesthetic appeal to function well, and are used to identify something for the viewer to recognize.

- Teaching games effectively accomplish what they're made for. It involves and immerses students in ways they can relate to and tinker with, rather than the alternate methods of being lectured at and told to sit down/shut up.

- Addiction: good or bad?
- - - If it's intentionally sought-after (like Zynga, Farmville, etc.) to primarily and selfishly generate profit, addiction is certainly malevolent. If a game happens upon it (WoW, Pokemon), that's the choice of the individual personality. Some people are more susceptible to addiction than others and that's not the fault of the game.

- Money vs. ethics
- - - Questions to ask: Are you comfortable selling it? Is it worth it? Do you really need it?

:::
After this and a quick lunch at Buckhorn, I wove around the career pavilion for a good chunk of the time. On the first day I spoke with Insomniac, Activision, and WB Games. The first two gave better portfolio advice (the WB Games staff was from HR), so here is their input for my work in a nutshell:

Insomniac:

- Focus
- - - If you want to do concept art, only show concept art. Larger companies are looking for specialists, whereas smaller companies are looking for generalists. It's most effective to show your best, most passionate work, and simply tell them that you're capable of doing other things, too. (these other things can be said on resumes)

- Paintovers
- - - Show smaller thumbnails of 3D environments/concepts and the paintovers of those. This method is quick, and shows that you can visualize a world/character/creature with accuracy and less effort.

- Good creature design, more environments they inhabit

Activision:

- Focus (again)

- They wanted more environments than anything else, as their only open internship was for an environment artist

- More beauty shots - from concept art to screenshots, characters to vehicles, give the art a focal point. Give the viewer something intriguing to look at. A piece of art can be infinitely gorgeous but boring as all hell.

:::
I got some sweet input from these guys and it will help improve my portfolio tenfold. Aside from the reviews, I signed up for the Metagame, which I admittedly didn't participate in much (t'was busy doing other things).

Amanda and I also sat in on the Art of Dead Space 2 talk from Ian Milham, where he analyzed the problems and strengths of Dead Space 1 that they carried over into the sequel. I loved seeing how he and his team constantly search for self-improvements, to make a better game and a better experience for the sake of the player. It was uplifting to hear they do a lot of the things we do in school: research, concept art, tests, repetition of form, art direction, and a ready for firm ear for the audience's input.

Afterwards, Amanda and I hounded Ian and kept asking him questions. Other audience members asked mine, but I had a doozy no one asked before:

Me: Who came up with the foam finger gun?
Ian: *jumps in excitement* I DID!!

Turns out, it was decided in a single meeting, rather fleetingly. They wanted to make a special gun for when the player beat the game on the most difficult level. Isaac's hand, however, was modeled into a single position: index in trigger, other fingers curling around the handle. At first they were going to leave it as is and make it a finger gun. Ian suggested a foam finger cannon. It would cover up the hand model and would be hilarious. So, they went with it. Kickass! I've got more notes from the DS2 talk itself, but I'll leave that to another update.

:::
The last events of Day One included the hilarious and inspiring Awards Ceremony. My favorite game, Amnesia: The Dark Descent, won a lot of awards, from excellence in sound to best of show. Boo yah! After the ceremony, we had a pleasant and badass game of Ninja with total strangers. Imagine a huge ring people trying to slap each other's hands in ninja-like movements, one at a time, until the final showdown between two people. It got pretty fast near the end!

That's all for today. Expect a post about the DS2 talk and Day Two soon.
-Kez

GDC Day 1

2011-03-03T08:41:00.000-08:00
Holy crap.

So, the conference is pretty much fantastic. Every aspect is exciting and enthralling, to the point that I find myself too tired to party once the day is done. I feel like such a lightweight.

Regardless, the first day was amazing. Amanda and I went to a roundtable about game production, wandered around the career pavilion, got portfolio reviews, played the Metagame, talked directly with professionals (Ian Milham from Dead Space 2!), watched the awards ceremony, and played ninja with total strangers.

I'll go into detail later - when I have time - and post some pictures too.

Until then,
-Kez

GDC

2011-03-01T10:21:00.000-08:00
Hello Earth and various people who inhabit it! (Or not. You never know when an astronaut might be watching.)

I'll be attending GDC - the Game Developer's Conference - in San Francisco this week. This blog will be updated with details from the event. It'll be my first time going; an experience to remember. I've never been farther from home. Cool!

Our flight leaves today and I'll be traveling with the magnificent Amanda Cha, my friend and classmate. Be sure to keep checking here for updates and whathaveyou. Expect a lot of photos, too.

Take care,
-Kez

O hey blog

2011-02-06T16:38:00.000-08:00
How's it going, world?

School started. Yaaay. The semester's going really well. For reasons unrelated, however, I felt pretty crappy the past few days. I even drew painful stuff to vent with, such as this:

But I feel better now. Huzzah. I'm modeling a 3D robot raptor character so I'll show you some pics of that progress another day. For now I hope things are well with anyone who might wander onto this blog.

Take care,
-Kez

I admittedly forget..

2010-12-30T12:39:00.000-08:00
..what I was getting at there, but no matter. It's fun to read things you wrote a while ago.

On that note, I recently came across some of my old writings. I've always had a story simmering on this mental back-burner. Looking at it is like revisiting insane and complex memories I'd forgotten. I remember vivid and countless things, all done by this strange thirteen- or fifteen-year-old kid. It feels good to witness how far my ideas have come - and how greatly some ideas have stuck.

But you're probably not here to read much, anyway. Have some wintery pictures of ice formations. Most of them are desktop-sized, too, so feel free to use them.

An Imperative Imagination

2010-10-21T16:01:00.000-07:00

Have some random scattered art thingies.

-----
There is a trend in all things which have succeeded. Think back to the most memorable movies you've seen or heard of.

Regardless of whether the movie was actually good or not, they probably share some common ground in world building. Media that generates fandoms, from huge convention-sized populations to elite followers, have a world that the viewer can dive into.

Star Trek, Star Wars, Firefly, Avatar, How to Train Your Dragon, countless animes, Harry Potter, you name it. They each have an instantly recognizable world; a world that is detailed enough for an audience to get lost in, but still leaves them wanting more.

It's comparable to a pool. A basic media grounded in reality could be a very good or very bad piece. Both, however, are pretty shallow. The human imagination can reach unfathomable depths which often never appear in such realistic creations. You may love 'The Notebook,' but there's nothing besides the movie. You can't swim any deeper into it: somewhat like a mental kiddy pool.

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On the other hand, there are films, books, games, etc. that have incredibly deep ends. They are so hardcore and detailed and thought over that a person can literally drown in the sheer amount of information. People willing to take the dive are the ones who become fans. From the shallows, they look into the deep and are enveloped into the world - whether it be Star Wars, Harry Potter, or even (sadly) Twilight. The vampire movie sucks (no pun intended) its audience in by providing them a vessel into the world: the main character. She's never described, has no personality, and has no outstanding features. Once a viewer sees the grotesquely detailed world around the character, however, they suddenly have a decision of whether to fill that main character with him or herself. They take the blank slate and inject themselves into the world. Neat, huh? And rather sinister. It's like a semi-deep pool with a powerful vacuum at the bottom.

Other franchises accomplish fan bases by providing enough opportunities for the audience to see what they'd want to be. Han Solo, dude. They find core fantasies that people strongly desire, but can't delve into (because reality and fantasy shouldn't mix, after all). Creating a world for the core fantasies to flourish gives the audience member a place to go, where they are accepted for whatever or whoever they want to be. Astronaut, hero, pilot, fighter, princess, whatever. Once you leave the shallows, the depths are strangely familiar and comfortable. And, you rarely ever want to leave.

This is why such films and books do so well. No matter the quality, they utilize their audience's own imagination and curiosity to get them hooked.

Hence, world building should be considered a subliminal art. Very crafty, very cunning. If it's too noticeable, the illusion is lost. And yes, some movies have tried a little too hard.

An example of 'too deep' is the live action version of The Last Airbender. The animated show was phenomenal. It gradually gave you a new world to place your mind into. It gave you recognizable aesthetics, character-driven plots, amazingly done animations, creatures, behaviors, places, all that jazz. A viewer can easily love the show. But the movie... The movie was a disgrace in that it tried to literally cram a description of the entire world (and plot) into a single film, whereas the series obviously took several seasons to do so. Rather than a steadily descent into the imaginative world, the live action movie tied a cement brick to your ankles and shoved you into a 30-foot deep hole.

All in all, a happy middle ground seems to work better than extremes on either end of this metaphorical pool. I've been working on a world for quite some time now, and hopefully by taking these things in mind it'll prove to be a success. Here's hoping.

Next time, I'll talk at you about why the heck this is even important.
Until then, take care.
-Kez

Long time

2010-09-26T14:46:00.000-07:00
Sorry, this has been taking up most of my free time as of late.

But! You're more likely to find intriguing items of interest over there, so feel free to drop by. I'll keep this blog up after things slow down. I might even end up combining these two sites...

Only time will tell. Peace,
-Kez

Your Ship has Arrived

2010-09-08T20:02:00.001-07:00

Finally. I've been trying to visualize her design for over seven years. Yes, she looks simple, and there's a reason for this. Everything there has a function, a purpose, down to the strange marks, window placements, and even overall shape. The only thing missing is her name.

Which will come to light soon.

Aha, told you I'd post something from Project Tall Order.

Take care,
-Kez

Fun with Fun

2010-09-02T08:20:00.001-07:00

Practice with new brushes turns into a sense jungle for the book project. It's not finished, as the values are way too dark for printing, but it's looking great so far (I've rarely done something of this caliber). Might even add a critter hiding in there. What do you think?

-Kez

Happy Banter

2010-08-25T12:20:00.000-07:00
Hello, long time no post. I said I would, but that was before the end of summer launched itself at me. Oh well.

Nutshell extravaganza:
-NYC trip
---American Museum of Natural History, Metropolitan Museum of Art,
-GenCon Indy
---Totally awesome
---Met artists in the industry, such as my new friend Charles Urbach
---Portfolio review by Jon Schindehette; incredibly inspiring and positive
---Bought some cool things, played some cool games, had a great time
-Back to college
---Drove down
---Got stuff, rearranged room, met friends, epic classes

While in NYC, I took some pictures (of course) and I know no one cares about my blog posts unless they have pictures in them, so here's the best picture, taken in Central Park. For some reason this photo honestly resonates with me, something that only happens in my photo sessions on rare occasion.

Animal Behavior

2010-08-08T20:24:00.000-07:00
As a quietly respectful enthusiast of the natural universe, I often find myself glued to various animal behavior displays.

Just now, for instance. It's rather late at night and I was the last person to go upstairs to bed. Before turning off the last lamp, I saw a little house fly on the couch, just chillin,' poking around, confused at the sudden waves of darkness. Instead of ignoring it or even swatting it away, I calmly reached my hand over to its side.

You'd think it would fly away, but it did not; in fact, it found my index finger somewhat interesting. After a few moments it casually made its way onto my nail, testing the surface with its strange, tubular mouth organ. It then made its way onto my skin, where I felt the typical tickle associated with flies.

I looked over this guy for a good, quick while. This was a neat chance to observe one up close and personal. Very interesting when you stop to really think about them.

Then, it flew off.

I've also compiled a few other intriguing animal behavior stories. I'll tell you these tales in the coming days. For now, here's a quick list of them:

-Damaged cicada
-Walk in park: water dog, large spider
-Friend's house: owl drama

On another note, GenCon Indy was absolutely magnificent. At the end of four days I was tired beyond recognition but I felt every penny I spent on a badge was worth it. I'll go into further details with that experience later, as well, when I'm not so exhausted.

Thanks for reading,
-Kez

Fruit

2010-07-30T10:21:00.001-07:00
Dear Tristan,

You left your citrus fruits at my house. So I drew them.

Sincerely,
-Kez

Art Update 03

2010-07-29T18:06:00.000-07:00
Another promo image for the book. A 'photo' of a creature who just detected you. ;D

Click it to see the enlarged version.

Enjoy!
-Kez

Dream & preview

2010-07-23T17:26:00.001-07:00
I feel like spouting some deep philosophical hoots, but nothing so profound is coming to mind right now.

Instead of boring you with that, I'll relay to you an anecdotal slice from Recent Daytime Nap Dream:

T'was a video game POV, jumping around in an action/platformer with mostly flat grey colors, like a greybox. There was also Optimus Prime, and he wanted to kill me while I was trying to get some strange inter- dimension-traveling train to work.

There was also my friend and classmate Joe. I think he was the character I played.

---

Have a couple sneak peek WIPs:

Underwater camera

2010-07-21T07:37:00.000-07:00
Looks like my underwater camera will need some getting used to:

Oh well. Yesterday, my sister and I went for a pleasant stroll around our neighborhood. There wasn't much to take pictures of, but here are a few magnificently cliche attempts at making suburbia look cool.

Inception of Thinking Entertainment

2010-07-19T10:43:00.000-07:00

The movie Inception has finally come out.

After first seeing the trailer months ago, I've been waiting for its release ever since. And it was worth it.

For the first time in a good, long while, here's a movie that truly forces you to think. During the movie, my mind strained with questions, suspense, and tension. It's a rare occurrence for a film to do so well these days when it lacks mindless explosions, unnecessary graphics, and emotionless characters.

Inception has everything it needs to make you really think. Instead of dragging you along a roller-coaster ride of overly done high-tech jargon and underdeveloped character, it shows you immense possibilities, dangers, and feelings that should come naturally with any great sci-fi thriller.

Mainstream audiences may have a somewhat difficult time calling it a sci-fi because even though the filmmakers address the technology, that is not the primary focus of the film. (I'm fairly certain that many people normally associate sci-fi with space ships and aliens) But, that is how sci-fi can most efficiently catch the eye of the audience. Not to go over their heads, or dumb it down; but to intrigue them enough to want MORE. Sci-fi is about critically asking questions about ourselves, creating new and strange situations, and showing the audience how something impossible is not as distant as we think.

Therefore, Inception lives up to its sci-fi thriller genre. In fact, it should be the forerunner of the genre, alongside Equilibrium, Serenity, and Moon

Seeing a movie like this gives me unbelievable hope in humanity, for a rather indirect reason. People are enjoying this thinking film. Now, maybe, people will once again think for themselves - and will call for more entertainment that follows in this film's footsteps. Yes, many movies have done this before, but Inception came out right as the entertainment industry becomes dire. (*coughTwilightcough*)

As far as Inception itself, it is filled with spine-chilling intensity cradled by a movie that does not rely so heavily on computer graphics or brain-numbing romance or violence. Its methods are mostly, and fittingly, all in your head.

-Kez

Tradigital sketch steps

2010-07-16T13:11:00.000-07:00
Test: pencil sketch, digital coloring

Steps & result:
Please excuse the tiny-ness of the thumbnail - simply click on the image to see it much larger

Art update 02

2010-07-15T14:05:00.000-07:00
I made an 'Art Update 01,' but didn't post any further art entries with such a sequential title. THUSLY:

Lunar Interplanetary wip:

Preview wip of Aekur:

Collaborative doodle between myself and Lhune, Pringles, aaand Taeso?

Spectacular photos

2010-07-08T12:30:00.001-07:00
Using StumbleUpon, I came across a series of photographs by David Doubilet, mostly of underwater and aquatic scenery and creatures. They've proven to be amazing for photo studies, because they are real places that feel fantastical. The best of both worlds!

Here's an example of a loose photo sketch study, based off a photo of his:

-click here to see the photos-

This photography makes me feel immensely nostalgic. I look into the image and want to go there, to see what's behind that rock, to explore the untold wonders and have adventures. Wanderlust drives me. Hopefully, with enough practice, more photo studies, and hard work, I can create such feelings in my own pictures.

-Kez

Scary beast

2010-06-28T23:24:00.001-07:00
Don't worry, he's more scared of you than you are of him.

..er, well, maybe not.

His name is Screamy.

-Kez

Return of the Yes

2010-06-24T14:42:00.000-07:00
As you can see, the design of my humble abode has altered quite a bit recently. I'm hoping to make it feel more like a home for my occasionally written and drawn spewings, and I hope you like it, too.

Blogger's template designer is perfect for a visual thought process regarding web design, in this sense. I especially like the instant previews. However, I take issue with the fact that I can't use my own images (for backgrounds, etc.) and can't have transparent colors. But no matter!

Maybe I can keep blogging afloat this time around. Thanks for bearing with me.

-Kez

Some art

2010-06-23T20:24:00.000-07:00
Here's some random art, mostly unfinished.

Mostly warm colors?
-Kez

Photo reference hunting

2010-05-18T13:40:00.000-07:00
Wow, I really do suck at keeping a blog. Huzzah.

This summer, I'll be working on a portfolio. Time to tackle my weak points:
-Landscapes/backgrounds
-Foliage
-Human faces
-Mechanical/industrial

I've been snooping around and taking photo references. So have some nature-y photos! They're mostly taken in the back yard.. Which is difficult, seeing as I live in suburbia. Good thing my parents are awesomely lazy and don't tend to it often; this lets the plants overgrow and go nuts. It's pretty cool.

---
But these photographs' fields of view, in general, feel rather restricted. When I step outside, my predatory forward-facing human eyeballs take in wider ranges of information than the camera can get.. so I tried my hand at taking multiple pictures for a panoramic-esque view. You can still see the seams.. xD But I tried.

Random update

2010-04-12T16:03:00.000-07:00
I have a blog?

Instead of filling in weeks (months..?) of stuff no one cares about, I'll list the good stuff:

1) My artist's booth at Megacon 2010 was a huge success, despite the massive waves of FFFFFFUUUUU associated with it.
2) College is: frustrating / fun / challenging / unforgiving / almost over for the semester, thank dear Zeus.
3) Summer.. plans?
- - - Internship?
- - - Commissions (job), portfolio, messing with UDK and/or Maya
- - - Vacation maybe?
- - - Possibly working out a sketchbook publishing deal... *shifty eyes*
4) True story:

Ttfn,
-Kez

Dreams - Morning of February 28th

2010-02-28T14:23:00.000-08:00
Apocalyptic zombie Pokemon infestation on a flat plane world that only consists of woods, streets, and suburban houses everywhere.

..Yeah, I don't even know.

I've dreamt of this suburban setting before, actually (Not with apocalyptic zombie Pokemon, mind you). In the last one, it was a dark stormy night, and hurricanes were on their destructive way towards us. I had a shovel. There was a red light.

---

I might edit this post later to include art/classwork.

Creativity and Education

2010-02-21T08:02:00.000-08:00
I recently watched a TEDTalks video of Sir Ken Robinson discussing creativity and our educational system. It made so much sense, my mind was officially blown.

It's 20 minutes long, but each minute is fantastic. (watch it if/when you have the time)

What he says here really hits home for me. I didn't do very well in school; especially in earlier years, when the other kids picked on me for being creative, hyperactive, and artistic (because, somehow, being able to draw a really cool dragon makes me a freak). They would say I had a disease called "Katherinitis," a clever word combining my first name Katherine and -itis.

Let's just say, my parents didn't keep me in public elementary school for long. They eventually put my brother and I into a tiny homeschool run by a woman named Mrs. McPeak. The only other student there was a little girl who had bronchitis and couldn't go to public school.

It was an interesting place, and an interesting time. McPeak had a huge yard sloping up in the back, where the schoolhouse lay. She had a few _very_ old computers. Two colors: black screen and green text. In this school, she didn't teach us like the public schools did. We'd get assignments, but they were much more relaxed. Sometimes she'd ask us what we wanted to learn. My brother once did a paper on cats, and I a paper on aurora borealis. Other times, she'd bring in something new and interactive, like lego cars we built with engines that we could program (with the _very_ old computers and _very_ floppy floppies). Overall, it was sporadic learning based on our own curiosities, which in my opinion helped my development greatly.

After this, my parents homeschooled us. After that, we went to a fundamental religious school I appreciated, but dearly wish never to return to. For eighth grade, public school; and for all of high school, a medium-sized private school.

All in all, I think the reason some parents are assuming their kids have ADD or ADHD is because their kids are growing in a school system that values sitting still, shutting up, and listening. This isn't how kids should learn, in my humble opinion. As for myself, I may have Asperger's but I function quite all right. I do, however, have a hard time sitting still in various situations.

But is this a bad sign? Or is it a sign that this education system is not best for everyone? I have tons of friends who do well in what we've got now... But I can name a good handful of friends who could have immensely benefitted from a different education.

Nowadays, college life has freed my lifestyle. Sure, I've got a few pet peeves about it, but the open environment (literally and academically) has allowed me to push my artistic endeavors further, in the direction I've chosen to go.

---

Recent projects:

This morning, everything was gorgeous outside, so I wandered around aimlessly, taking pictures. Here are a couple good ones:

I like the squirrel picture a lot.. so I made it wallpaper-sized (click on it to see it larger).

Sorry for not posting much recently,
-Kez

Thoughts in the Nebulae

2009-12-31T22:17:00.000-08:00
There's an enormous, distant, and almost unfathomable reason why getting ourselves into space travel is essential to the human race. The moment we can physically look back at our home, one tiny speck amongst trillions of other tiny specks, will be the moment we can tell ourselves "Wow. We're very small. Imagine what other worlds might exist in those other countless arrays of stars and planets. All these petty issues on Earth hardly matter when the universe is out there, beckoning us forward. Let's drop the crap that separates humanity, and show all known existence what we can do together."

Some respond to such an idea with "But doesn't that make you feel insignificant? Why continue living if it's pointless and daunting beyond comprehension?"

I respond with, "It took us billions of years to get here. Why ruin what little slice of consciousness we have? This is what our universe is, and this is what we can do. Now, let's explore, understand, have fun, and live it to the fullest extent. Plus, it's cool."

Dragon

2009-12-25T17:54:00.000-08:00
Sorry for not updating in a while. Things are going well! Got a 3.6 for this semester, learned tons of stuff, made fantastic friends at college, and got a head cold the day I got home for break. =D I'm better now, though, and drew a dragon:

Feel free to click on the image to see the much larger size. I decided to try and beat myself at digital painting, and in my humble opinion it was rather successful. If you have any critiques, please don't hesitate to comment.

I hope you're all having a great winter!
-Kez

When Artists Rest in Stasis

2009-11-10T21:50:00.000-08:00
A bizarre situation, indeed.

I'm specifically speaking about artists on any skill level who are caught in a perpetual state: a state lacking in improvement, and sometimes, succumbing to regression.

Two cases of such a feat have caught my eye in the past year. These online people were relatively close to me. For both, I met them years and years ago (before/at the beginning of high school), lost contact with them, and recently found their work again. I've decided to write about them. I won't mention names, but it's much too hard to describe their situation without at least a description and background.

-long post warning-

Misguided Comfort Zone:

Upon first finding this person on the Internet, back in my preteen years, I was amazed. It started a small obsession for me, which guided my art in a strange, but temporary, direction. Their art primarily existed (and continues to exist) in the realm of fan art to a popular franchise. The dinosaurs and characters they drew seemed so distant and professional to me. From my point of view, I could see this person taking their talent and skill into a career one day.

Now, at least six years later, I found myself thinking of them again. I looked them up online, and lo and behold, still around! And rather active at that. This thrilled me to no ends, and I instantly rushed to see their art.

It is an oddly tragic thing to idolize artist's work one day, then years later look upon it with surprised confusion and worry. They had hardly improved. In six years, their subject matter, skill, and style remained the same. Some aspects had even relapsed.

For instance, instead of improving anatomy, lighting, shading, and an expanded understanding of digital art tools like Photoshop and Corel Painter... They focused on developing a more painterly digital technique. This technique itself is a difficult thing to grasp. It can be done extremely well, but only after the foundations of art creation are understood. Yes, it is very apparent their recent art is more painterly. But without a full, well-rounded grasp on such aforementioned skills, their works lack integrity that one would expect after six years.

That isn't to say this artist is a bad person. Quite the opposite! They're very polite and amiable. In the past few weeks, they have finally begun expanding their subject matter, so I am curious as to how they will address more realistic approaches.

This in complete contrast to...

Improvement is Unnecessary, for [Self-Proclaimed] Mastery is Already Achieved:

When I first met this person, I could really connect with them. We were both young and breaking into our teens - out to take the world by storm. To me, they drew really cool dragons and art in general. We would roleplay our characters together, talk about art, and blab about random crap.

Unbeknownst to my teenaged Internet self, this person led a ridiculously psychotic online life.

They suddenly contacted me a few months ago. I hadn't spoken with them in probably four or five years. I was pleasantly astonished to meet them again, instantly curious about their artwork, and they eagerly guided me to a couple pieces.

I found myself feeling the same as I did with the previously mentioned person. This person had not improved. In a way, their skills even deteriorated.

With further investigation, I discovered their other online life: the one I must have been too blindly naive to notice way back when. They self-proclaimed themselves as a Master Artist sent from God - born with holy talent. Supposedly, they began consciously drawing at the ripe age of two. Those dragons and characters they drew?: a majority were copied off the style and scheme of a popular artist. They developed such a conceited attitude, that when they asked for comments about their art, they completely ignored any and all critique, suggestion, or help - even from professional artists (whose art was then called, and I quote, "shitty"). Their excuse circled around the idea that their art is already perfect. It is strange that they see themselves as divine, and then fish for compliments in every aspect of their life. If perfection is achieved, what would they care about what others think? One moment they say no one else matters, and the next moment they squeeze positive feedback out of you. Those who have provided even the slightest negative feedback have been ignored, cussed at, or argued against.

You might think I'm kidding, but the sad truth is that I am not.

As for their art specifically, the transparency of their artistic deterioration allows me to see who this person really is. They consistently avoid drawing hands and complete faces. Cartoony, simplified, and always identical facial features float around sporadically in their sketchbook, detached from completion. If they draw a torso, that torso is guaranteed to lack at least the head, legs, and hands. Sometimes, this goes so far as to forget about the arms, or even gravity. They boast a professional grasp of art but what they deem as professional is widely known as a fear of change and development, under the guise of self-proclaimed 'perfection.' Their understanding of anatomy is incredibly childish. They say they use references: art books, photography, life studies, and such. But looking at their work, you would never guess this.

It seems they unfortunately fall into what art professors call 'Drawing what you think you see / what you wish to see, and not what you actually see.' This is more common a trait than you'd like to think, but most growing artists pop out of this box. It is easily amended with some honest training, willingness to improve, and an open mind.

...Which this person lacks. I have never seen a worse case of narcissism.

Two entirely different personalities, yes. Should these people ever visit my humble little blog and recognize themselves, know that I don't regret what I've said, for it's true. To the first person - you're awesome because you are still working towards improvement. I'm excited about what you have in store for the future. To the second person - grow up.

If anyone out there is curious about the subject, feel free to comment here, drop me an email, or message me on AIM. I'm always open to discussions. =)

Art Update 01

2009-11-04T12:36:00.000-08:00
I noticed a serious lack of art here. This situation is now amended. (sorry about the terrible image size+quality, I'll try to fix it) Here is some art I have done/have been working on this semester, both in and out of class:

Creepy skull monster thing

Ideas for the purple ship posted earlier

Linux Penguin stress ball, modeled for class in Maya

I felt the penguin didn't allow me much freedom, model-making-wise, so I've been messing around in Maya if/when I find the time.

Alley concept for CA(3D) class. My idea wasn't chosen, but we're working on a much cooler idea. ;)

A wooden pallet for CA class

Lots of stuff in Unreal

My next prop model for Unreal is a mattress (doesn't look like anything yet...)

Art as Illusion & Aesthetics

2009-11-02T17:38:00.000-08:00
I recently gave a presentation to my Aesthetics class. Each of us had chosen a class session to present the topic of their choice relating to art and philosophy. My presentation summarized my own personal definition of art:

Art as illusion and aesthetics. Basically, 'perception deception' and brain-candy combine forces to make cool stuff like art, music, movies, games, etc., that people enjoy because it appeals to the senses. I defended my views by saying the more a person can recognize aspects of the piece, the better - whether that's complete realism, or a gestural and eerie painting of a crow, it's up to the creator's intentions of how they want viewers to see their piece. I'm bad at summarizing it, but moving on.

It proved to erupt a great argument in class. A couple of the students were aghast that my definition basically throws out, and I quote, "..the past one-hundred years of art." Namely abstract and modern art that resembles this level of skill, mastery, and talent:

(not my image)

Anyway, I actually told the girl that I didn't want to offend her or be very harsh, so I stopped my presentation short (short? It wasn't supposed to exceed 20 minutes, but I stood there arguing for a good 45 minutes, haha). If I had continued, however, I would have told her my later Facebook status:

"...sorry, but I have to let this out... A flat blue canvas is to art, as homeopathy is to medicine. It is -not-. Pseudoscience and pseudoart: things that try to play in the realm of reason but only succeed in ruining it. So sue me, argue with me, whatever you please. It just seems duly insulting when the profession I'm aiming for can be more easily achieved by, apparently, shitting in a can. [insert image of a serious artist's creation: a can of their own poo]"

Harsh, huh? Yeah, sorry; stuff like that angers me.

Besides, in all honesty, isn't art cooler when you see this sci-fi photo-manipulation I made...

...and after that, I tell you it's all from texture photographs I took around my own campus? It's not space at all. It's pixels on a screen. ;D

Oh well. I had a great Halloween, btw: I hope you did too!

Dreams - Morning of October 23rd

2009-10-27T12:44:00.000-07:00
Late, I know. I've been busy! < /excuse >

This is my second dream with any sighting of Project Tall Order. I've found this to be odd - I've been working on the story consciously since I was thirteen, which is about six years now. You'd think it would reign over my dreams because I've been cooking it for so long, and so often.

Alas, I've only had two dreams with any hint of the story. The first one was years ago - my primary character gazed, awestruck, into an enormous mass of stellar explosion careening towards his little space ship. Scary, yes. This actual scene, at the time, had little to do with the story (because that night's dreams beforehand had nothing to do with anything).

This second dream was more unmistakable.

---

I was running away from some specific group of people, chasing me across dreams. I was driving down a road in an industrialized country town, to a part where houses became worn from years of negligence. Earlier, I had paid three quarters to be picked up and taken to safety by friends of mine.

When I reached the opposite side of a ruined house, I found myself in a gray field. A dark helicopter amongst the gritty, dusty sky arrived, and landed in front of me. We took off, and I looked at the faces of my allies.

Lo and behold, it was the character I drew a couple posts ago, and the third and last main character who I've often drawn (but not yet a portrait of). They were joking around and arguing playfully, holding onto the interior of the helicopter as we blazed up to the sky.

---

Again, this is a rare thing for me. But I'm finally getting these ideas into the open, even in such tiny doses, and it makes the story more real - and therefore, easier to dream about. It's tough to see your own ideas in your dreams when they are not solidified. Now that my thoughts are becoming stable, I can actually see them firsthand - in my conscious drawings and my dreams.

Neat, huh? 8D

Dreams - Morning of October 19th

2009-10-20T19:05:00.000-07:00
The world is colder, and human presence is lacking.

It is early winter everywhere. Here, in a frost-hidden city, a lone man wearing winter clothes and a dark green beanie to cover his ears walked around, mulling something about alien abduction.

He wandered his way into a rather sizable house. All its windows and doors were either open or broken clean through - letting years and years of frosted snow enter, and coat every surface with barely distinguishable cloaks of chill white. Various furniture, covered long ago by plastic in a futile attempt to protect it, was scattered about the two-story, open living room. The man's eyes brightened up.

"This is a great place to do some Parkour," he said to himself, and began jumping on the furniture. The ice on the tables, couches, chairs, counters, crunched under the new weight. The points of impact dazzled with ice shards freshly broken.

A goldfish appeared in front of him, and the man quickly stopped himself before it. His eyes watched the fish as it floated around in its own warm glow, emanating heat, and a strange nostalgic beauty.

The man calmed as weird sensations came over him.

"I want to be a fish, too. The aliens need to abduct me... I want them to abduct me."

In the corner of his eye, the man spotted a few said aliens. Upon realizing he saw them, the aliens fled. The man instantly began chasing them.

A few Notes of Interest

2009-10-17T09:03:00.000-07:00
First, I'll start off on a happy note: I have Jell-O! It is delicious.

Second, no doubt many others have seen this, but lately it's been particularly apparent to me that people really hate it when you question their lifestyle. I mean, who wouldn't? On the receiving end, things you've been taught; your thought process; things you've known to be true or false, are suddenly being interrogated under a spotlight. Daunting, no? It's a threat to one's method of living. I highly sympathize with reactions of confusion, frustration, sadness, anger - because it is natural to feel that way. I know this all too well.

But even though it hurts, I will be blunt: this is no excuse to disregard inquiry.

I'm speaking from my own stance here. If I question you, I'm doing it to not only understand you better, but to make you understand yourself better, to make you understand what you sound like to me. I ask out of personal curiosity. Yes, I acknowledge that it can and likely will boil your blood. If and when you do the same thing to me, my blood boils as well!

However, there are two different ways a person can take questioning. When I discover something about myself or the world around me, I can fully realize it. I can integrate it into my being. I can learn from my mistakes, and move on, and life can - and usually does - turn out for the better. Like the scientific method, even if I am deeply rooted in my knowledge or opinion, I must always be open to inquiry: mostly and especially towards that which makes more sense. Instead of pouting stubbornly, I take it into consideration.

Call me cold and logical and rational, but allow me to explain. Recently, I was re-taught the three basic functions of the human brain: the "Old" brain, the Limbic system, and the Cerebral Cortex.

The Old brain (also known as the reptilian brain) holds simplistic, primal instincts. Hunger, fear, lust, pugnacity, physical reflexes, etc. This is the animal in every human.

The Limbic holds the emotions. Love, sadness, anger, longing, happiness, etc.

The Cerebral Cortex is where higher cognitive thinking occurs. Rationality, consciousness, logistics, ideas, etc.

Whilst talking about these functions in my Dangerous Ideas course, people in my class tried to put them in order of importance. Although they made good general sense, I proposed that none of these are more important than the next. To make my point more clear, I gave examples. A person who lives only within the reptilian functions obviously lacks in higher understanding and sympathy. A person who relies purely on emotions will forget about their basic needs, and make irrational decisions. A person who only thinks about life and doesn't act is lacking in emotions and basic needs. This applies to all levels between the three functions.

Limbic + Cerebral = repressing deep desires
Cerebral + reptilian = absent of emotions
..And so on and so forth.

When a human is dysfunctional, these three features are not on the same level, or not close to the same level. The more the levels fluctuate, the more dysfunctional the person. A person is at their best when they take care to fulfill all these attributes. The Cerebral checks and balances the Limbic and reptilian so they don't go too far. The Limbic gives personal meaning to the Cerebral and reptilian. The reptilian feeds the pure instinct of the body - to satisfy the animal in all of us, to make our bodies content so they we may focus on other things.

I hope I've covered enough to make sense out of this outlook of mine. I try to balance myself between these kinds of thoughts. So far, it's worked pretty darn well!

To leave on a happy third note, enjoy a sneak peak of one of my main characters, plus a few more arts! :D

Drawings for my project in Game Design class:

And, my kitty:

Exploratory Mission

2009-10-01T13:43:00.000-07:00
Work in progress. This is the only explanation you get! Arr.

Off to find Seakai for tea, crumpets, and the means for unlocking the universe, brb.

Omg, you see that dark plant-looking thing there? That'll kill you.

Ew, do not want.

I call it Sparky, the killer spore-flinging fungus.

Lol cute.

Dreams - Morning of September 29th

2009-09-29T20:48:00.000-07:00
A night of many dreams; one in particular stood out as downright creepy.

---

The setting morphed with a sudden momentum and landed dead-center in a brightly lit, claustrophobic jungle, where an extravagant plant-ridded mansion lay dead. I moved to my left, heading down the mansion's right wall, and soon found I had begun stepping on the stone tiles leading me into the back garden. The garden, without a doubt, was incredibly well-kept, but by whom, I shall never know.

With its curvy rows of flowers and bushes broken occasionally by a tall tree and red-brick walkways, the garden seemed a haven in the craze of the jungle. Before I could even breach beyond the mansion's back corner, however, I stopped in my tracks.

Out from the short shrubs to my immediate left, a tiny sheep appeared.

It was unlike any sheep I had ever seen... namely because this sheep was.. not only small, but its entire body a pale lime green. And stiff. The sheep stood completely erect, its feet locked together, its head locked forward, facing the wall of the mansion - all while moving towards the mansion at a slow, constant pace. And seeping out of the sheep - mouth unmoving - came a soft, airy voice filled with sincere concern.

"Molly..?"

I watched it move before me, in a straight line against the ground, body unwavering.

"..Molly? ...... Molly..?"

Time slowed, and the voice carried on.

"....Molly?"

---

-Kez

Dreams - Morning of September 28th

2009-09-28T14:05:00.000-07:00
Warning - These dreams often make little sense. Trying to understand them can cause socket damage.

---

Last night, I dreamt of a relatively small city-town, a cross between the Paris in Aristocats and the city of Lady and the Tramp.

..Only, deep at night, with the streets dimly lit by lamp posts and the occasional kindle escaping a window. No one was awake aside from two dogs.

The stocky hound was sniffing around the city, closely followed by his taller, ganglier friend. Together they discreetly searched the streets for clues. Recently, a good handful of crimes had been committed by a mysterious, unknown dog, and these two were out looking for a lead.

The hound kept reassuring his friend that he'd find something, while his buddy quietly insisted on hopelessness. After a great deal of searching benches, tables, posts, and dumpsters, the taller dog absentmindedly said "Maybe he doesn't shed."

Abruptly halted by the thought, the hound turned to his friend slowly with a grim discernment. "He doesn't shed," he said, shocked, and gradually sat down to take it all in. "He doesn't shed."

---

-Kez

I'm nuts and proud of it

2009-09-25T10:02:00.000-07:00

Space fish likes your spaceship.
All images (C) me, Kezrek, 2009 - do not use without permission

Greetings!

I don't concern myself with worldly things to the degree in which many would want to believe. Please don't interpret that as some sort of blind belief. Upon entering my room, whether it be at home or at college, the first thing you'll notice is a lack of stuff.

It's like visiting a friend's house, and she shows you her room... only to think she's been mistaken, and shown you the relatively barren, hospital-like guest room, with pale walls tinted green and an off-white carpet worn dense by years of walking. There is only one window, and it only takes in direct sunlight in the dark months of winter.

Various small hints of ownership hide in plain sight. Namely, this includes a few dinosaur figurines upon a low dresser, locked in interaction, two painterly tropic-themed posters, a small row of sci-fi DVDs, big headphones attached to a small blue iPod, and several other items.

Before all else, I'm Katherine, aka Kezrek. I live in this room, and thrive in this room, for it allows my imagination to focus; to soar. The primary reason I own things is because they are functional, and give me a means for putting my thoughts on paper. I utilize my dinosaur figurines for references, the tropical posters for inspiration, the sci-fi DVDs for ideas, my headphones and iPod for musical motivation, and my drawing materials, which I use to thrust my imagination upon this world.

Spinosaurus aegypticus tooth for the win!

I have one load of laundry worth of clothes. I have one pair of high heels, and they sit at home in my closet, resting from their one-time thus-far use, at high school graduation. I have one pair of sandals, and two pairs of sneakers - one for hot summers and one for cold winters. My hair is washed, and brushed, and nothing else (air-dried, not blow-dried). I've never owned or used any makeup. My idea of a good time is playing video games, drawing, laughing, and reminiscing over life.

These are merely a few of my features. I'd like to thank my parents for tolerating my strange ways, and supporting my attendance at Ringling College of Art and Design as a Game Art & Design major. I love them very much. With each moment at college, I strive to make them proud for investing in me; this means working my best and learning as much as I can. Even if they never read this, I want to make it clear. =)

So, in a nutshell, that's me. This will be my blog, and it will be neat. Hopefully I can keep it going. Expect drawings both in and outside of college, sketches of dreams I've had, random spurts of philosophical jargon, and the occasional excerpt from Project Tall Order.

...What's Project Tall Order? It'll have a different title soon enough. Like any artist on the Internet, I want to make a webcomic. Unfortunately, my idea for one involves a lot of drawing skills I do not yet fully possess. So, stay tuned.

A hint of my project - but it's generally outdated. I'll redraw it eventually. (C) myself